Oscars 2009

11:56 PM

Perhaps Mickey Rourke can help them clear the stage.

11:53 PM

Best picture winner is Slumdog Millionaire. Look in the trades tomorrow for Slumdog Jeopardy to come out of turn-around. The stage is more crowded than a Mumbai bazaar. But it’s nice that the kids are up there to experience an awards ceremony they had no idea existed a year ago.

11:50 PM

These montages would be a lot cleverer if it wasn’t ten minutes to midnight.

11:48 PM

Hugh Jackman has been let out of the witness protection program just in time to wrap things up.

11:44 PM

I really hope the ink is dry on Mickey Rourke’s Iron Man 2 contract.

more –

11:42 PM

A potentially refreshed Robert De Niro invokes all of Sean Penn’s past roles in establishing his genius. This device really does make it feel like a privilege just to be nominated. Anthony Hopkins would really like to forget Meet Joe Black.

11:33 PM

Kate Winslet prepares to rip a whole in the space-time/possibility continuum as she wins her final award of the year. Speech highlights: the bath/shampoo bottle/Kate image; um, then my connection seized up.

11:28 PM

“You continue to push back the borders of what’s possible.” Let’s thank about this for a moment. This is putting Kate Winslet on the same level as Edmund Keane, David Garrick, and probably whoever put the Oedipus mask on for the first time.

11:25 PM

Oh Christ … Kate Winslet hasn’t won yet?

11:22 PM

Danny Boyle, best director winner, complements the awards production. He’ll be invited back next year. In Britain, he is put forward for sainthood.

11:11 PM

Death montage! Death montage! (Very badly directed – stop moving the camera! They’re dead!)
I didn’t know they were dead: Van Johnson, Paul Scofield, John Michael Hayes
Who? Bud Stone, Nina Foch, Evelyn Keyes
Sad: Pat Hingle, Harold Pinter, Kon Ichikawa, Roy Scheider, Richard Widmark, Claude Berri, Isaac Hayes, Ricardo Montalban, Manny Farber!, Jules Dassin, Stan Winston, Charlton Heston, Anthony Minghella, Sydney Pollack, Paul Newman … Newman headlines the celestial marquee.

11:07 PM

Probably the night’s only upset. Best foreign film goes to Departures from Japan. Did The Class and Waltz with Bashir cancel each other out?

11:01 PM

Could have been Bruce … or Vampire Weekend’s fave singer. Instead, A.R. Rahman wins it for “Jai o.” Interesting line: “All my life I’ve had a choice between hate and love, and I chose love.” Looking forward to the E! True Bollywood Story.

10:55 PM

A.R. Rahman wins for Slumdog. Considering he’s as much a musical trailblazer as Isaac Hayes–a Tamil working in the Bollywood industry–his speech fails to make much of the moment.

10:45 PM – 10:46 PM

10:43 PM

Eddie Murphy … must be the beginning of the death montage.

10:36 PM

They didn’t mention Will Smith would be hosting. Chris Dickens wins his first Oscar, and is the first person to thank “everyone who voted for me.”

10:31 PM

Visual effects goes to Benjamin Britten. For what it’s worth, most of the production and tech people (incl. costumes and art direction) taking home awards have not won before.  Sound editing goes to The Dark Knight, whose editor previously won for Master and Commander. Sound mixing goes to Slumdog Millionaire. Pretty much invincible. First Oscars for Tapp, Pryke and Pookutty. (Now THAT’S a law firm.)

10:18 PM

Doc short subject goes to: Smile Pinki. Which makes up for the poor girl being trampled by the Japanese cast of Damages on the red carpet.

10:16 PM

Man on Wire wins for best director. Sadly, the star does not walk a high-wire across the stage. But he DOES do magic tricks! Hoorah!

10:08 PM

Heath Ledger wins the only Oscar anybody will remember next year.

10:07 PM

More Actors Anonymous testimonials … Surprise that Joel “Cabaret” Grey isn’t giving the Heath ledger speech. Cuba Gooding Jr. is the best he’s been since the last time he was on that stage.

9:59 PM

Can somebody tell Philip Seymour Hoffman that they already cast, directed, shot and released the Notorious B.I.G. story?

9:53 PM

Calling Val Kilmer and his horse … it’s Hugh Jackman in a “hommage” to the musical.  It would seem that although there are over 200 million people in the U.S., Beyonce is the only woman who can sing.

9:49 PM

Best short film: Something absolutely unpronounceable. (It stands for “Toyland,” apparently.) Have they issued an APB for the missing Hugh Jackman yet?

9:46 PM

Meta-moment: James Franco, playing his character from Pineapple Express, watching James Franco kiss Penn in Milk. Who’s gayer?

9:36 PM

First ever Oscar for Anthony Dod Mantle, who also handled the cinematography chores on julien donkey-boy. Whoa.

9:33 PM

Natalie Portman has finally found a leading man smaller than she is. Second Joaquin Phoenix gag of the week!

9:28 PM

Did I miss the memo that The Dark Knight was a romance? Oh wait, not THAT kind of romance … Nice juxtaposition of Milk with Revolutionary Road, btw.

9:25 PM

Makeup: Benjamin Bunny and a speed reader. But you know who’s really winning tonight? MOVIES are winning.

9:22 PM

First win for Michael O’Connor for The Duchess. He achieves the very British distinction of being extremely polite and absolutely insufferable.

9:20 PM

Daniel Craig is angling for the lead in a remake of The Petrified Forest.

9:18 PM

Best art direction: Walter Benjamin’s Button.  Despite what Jake Gyllenhaal thinks, David Fincher is a “wonderful human being.”

9:16 PM

No one’s going to mention it, but Bill Conti and the band are in very good form. Huh, they DON’T till get dressed up to work for the phone company?

9:12 PM

Best animated film: La Maison du something something something … Did the director just say, “My eyes, so heavy?” I know the feeling.

9:09 PM

Duh. Wall-E for best animated film. Jack Black is cheering and HE WAS IN one of the other nominees.

9:04 PM

Simon Beaufoy wins for best adapted screenplay. Please God, no one say, “The British are coming! The British are coming!”

8:59 PM

Winner for best original screenplay: Dustin Lance Black for Milk. Sean Penn is either deeply moved or passing wind. DLB explains how Harvey Milk’s story inspired him–more than Paul Lynde in the center square?

8:56 PM

Hugh is going to take us through the steps of making a movie. Hope this movie is not directed by Terence Malick or we’ll be here all night.

8:53 PM

Penelope Cruz is dignified, sniffly, and follows Javier Bardem with a little espanol.

8:50 PM

First winner is Penelope Cruz. These mash notes to the nominees are an interesting idea. They also seem to stop time.

8:41 PM

This is the first Oscar ceremony to be directed by Max Fischer!

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4 Responses to “Oscars 2009”

  1. Mickey and Scarlett: Iron Man and the Sunglasses Question « SquallyShowers Says:

    […] good news for Mr. Rourke, who was feared MIA after losing his Oscar to Sean Penn. He’s in Russia stumping for The Wrestler. Finke says that he’ll begin researching […]

  2. Tribeca: But Wait! There’s More! « SquallyShowers Says:

    […] Departures: You remember … that Japanese film wot won the Oscars? […]

  3. Tribeca Trailers: From American Casino to Easy Virtue « SquallyShowers Says:

    […] See what happens when Waltz with Bashir and The Class split the Oscar vote! […]

  4. The Slate: Megan Fox, Sex and the City 2, Endless Possibilities « SquallyShowers Says:

    […] that Mickey Rourke. He got a faceful of Marisa Tomei’s ta-tas in The Wrestler. Now Megan Fox might have a toot on his trumpet. Hey, get your mind of the gutter. Mitch […]

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